:: oNly yOu ::
.. -!!sometimes i wish things were like before!!- ..
i'm sick. wth. on exam period. wad shit. janice is at taiwan now. i miss her. very nice of her sms me at 5.44am when i was sleeping how to sms back!!! =( oh well. i miss miss her. my buddy manz how can i dun miss her.
talked to yu xian yesterday told me like ouracha for 4 years since sec 1 i assume. goodness me n her on the same boat. kind of advice her and stuff but suddenly realised why can i apply on myself. but i cant. shiitynarden i am suppose to forget her but it got worse goodness. my life is over i cried just now. was my dad's jing ming jie today. suddenly felt alone. being happy for 3 days i was just putting an up front. my soul n everything is so tired. hais. i cut my hair i like it. at least i smiled cos of that but i see the diff but not others. hais nevermind la. studying organic have some questions but i think its too late to ask manz. my life seems to be over. nothing seems the same without someone i love. she doesnt even reply smses maybe she didnt recieve [trying to look at the brighter side] suppose to go out on 15 april well i think its pretty clear that she forgets. thomas forget. i'll not go with jasen ok. gooodnesss hais. maybe i should play with some guy make myself happy. saw felicia today damn hot n chio manz. goodness sexy too. getting prettier day by day. but i hope she's on the right path of life and not those thingy. talk to her alittle. seems ok i mean sound not her. i know she changed. she look pretty manz. hais maybe i'll find some girl or guy. stead. dump and forget it. wad the hell. i'll never do that. it hurts people. but i'm always hurt by people whats the diff. where's my share of happiness that i wish for. hais. you're the one i love so much. yet a piece of love from you is difficult. the share i got was merely hurting my own piece of shattered heart. never my heart will heal. maybe i should be a postitute. or mamasan. maybe i'llbe happier that way. or invent some medicine and i'll be the genuine pig. hais i am waiting but haven i wait for so long. hais everyone get wad they want how about me. being cheerful and happy is what i wanted and let life be fun n always full of surprises. jasen i am not your pet ok. if thomas isnt here i am not his stand-by. fuck i am a by product to you is it. ARGH!!! i miss thomas. does he care? i dun think so. my share of care to so many people are just merely ice. my share of love to everyone are true and pure. my share of LOVE to "YOU" is true. i merely care for you now as a sister do i get a sister share of love back. i feel so dumb. hais maybe i should quit my course. migrate and leave in the middle of nowhere. just me n my shadow and my turtle shell where i heal n live
