@!@^#$&^&^*^%(&^this is crap, crap, crap and CRAP! why is this happening. i received the news that my dad's third brother passed away. for four consecutive years. four brothers passed away one by one, including my beloved dad. i break down in the canteen when i received the news. he had an operation not long ago, he look so healthy. why did this happen!! life is predestinated! i know that, but it shouldn't be that fragile. the fear in me is growing and growing. the fear of losing any other person. the feeling isnt nice at all. the glimpse of hope for me to conquer my fear is getting slimmer and slimmer. my grandmother lost 4 sons in four years. one year each. can she take it. the depress look on her face, sank my heart to the deepest extent. i dunno what to say to her. when she cry i weep, when she laugh i laugh out loud. but will laughter ever appear anymore on her face? her delightful and cheerful smile is disappearing. i cant even get a glance of that smile anymore. i love my family relative buddies and friends more than i least expect. the smile i had, is changing slowly, formatting to another kind of fake smile. where's the usual me? where's myself? my reflection? my hope? i seem to lose it. getting back onto my feet is tough than i ever could have dreamt. hais. life is so unpredictable, just as what janice have told me. what is life?
problematicsensationmadness
The Spongebob Has Spoken
